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We all know that torture is terrible. I mean really terrible. Bad.

Of course the bad guys do it. But sometimes the good guys have to do it, too. I know this because I saw the Dirty Harry movies.

So we probably have to torture those guys in Guantanamo, because they are bad guys and would torture us. But the thing is, that we are Americans and because we are really good at things, I'm sure we've mastered torture. So it probably isn't so torturous. Why else would the Vice President want to keep a loophole in the new torture law congress is proposing? He knows we've got this down, and being a good American, knows we'd lose our touch if we couldn't practice it.

And because we've refined and developed torture to such an art, we might want to think about extending it to places where we haven't tortured so far. Just so long as it is in a good cause.

You can't be too safe, and since we can't have a safe government with a bunch of irresponsible people leaking state secrets to irresponsible reporters, I'm sure Vice President Cheney, in addition to supporting the torture of those wicked, uncharged men in Guantanamo, would second this request to have the government torture C. Lewis (Scooter) Libby so we can find out who told him about that CIA agent gal.

Seems like torture in good cause to me.