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Can rich people catch a break? Here we have the spectacle of a war profiteer throwing a birthday bash for his sweet daughter--employing some of the most famous names in rock to do it--and suddenly the liberals are up in arms.

We say let the rich be. If the government doesn't catch you manufacturing a defective product until a few soldiers die, well, buyer beware. It's David Brook's money (via the taxpayers and the Pentagon). So he can blow it buying a few washed-up rock stars (and a drunk rapper) to serenade his daughter. Everyone, after all, buys defective product now and then.

Much has been made of this video clip on the liberal blogs. They are chortling watching our president unable to open a locked door. Some of them are even making specious analogies about exit strategies in Iraq.

Well, this video should make all supporters of RSA proud. A locked door could happen to anyone. But how our president responds is special. He doesn't look over and ask someone for help. That would be rude. Instead, he parks himself in the corner like a good boy, and waits until someone directs him. Confused and waiting for direction.

Not like that's an analogy for anything.

At RSA, we've had enough of smirking liberals discussing the president's penchant for tying one on now and then. Everyone knows a bender takes the edge off. The president, after all, has a lot of stress. Really, a lot. It's hard work being president. So I say the man deserves a drink or two. Or three. Or five. Or eight.

Listen, these damn northern teetotalers don't understand the value of a six-pack, seven-ounce, Texas Saturday night. They have absolutely no sense of fun. So the White House keeps having to invent these lame excuses (like the pretzel incident) to explain the results of Bush getting his freak on.

We say enough. There's nothing wrong with the hair of the dog that bit ya at breakfast. Or a three martini lunch. Or a six-pack or two with dinner. You need something to relax you when you have to make all these hard decisions--especially when some of your best buddies are lookin' to do a stretch upstate at any moment.

Cut the guy a break. He's drunk, and we're better off for it.

We all know that torture is terrible. I mean really terrible. Bad.

Of course the bad guys do it. But sometimes the good guys have to do it, too. I know this because I saw the Dirty Harry movies.

So we probably have to torture those guys in Guantanamo, because they are bad guys and would torture us. But the thing is, that we are Americans and because we are really good at things, I'm sure we've mastered torture. So it probably isn't so torturous. Why else would the Vice President want to keep a loophole in the new torture law congress is proposing? He knows we've got this down, and being a good American, knows we'd lose our touch if we couldn't practice it.

And because we've refined and developed torture to such an art, we might want to think about extending it to places where we haven't tortured so far. Just so long as it is in a good cause.

You can't be too safe, and since we can't have a safe government with a bunch of irresponsible people leaking state secrets to irresponsible reporters, I'm sure Vice President Cheney, in addition to supporting the torture of those wicked, uncharged men in Guantanamo, would second this request to have the government torture C. Lewis (Scooter) Libby so we can find out who told him about that CIA agent gal.

Seems like torture in good cause to me.